4
Task-1
Let's Learn from Others' Mistakes
Common Errors
1
Source: Mr Aniket Mehla 24-06-23 MT 1
Original Text
The given pie chart shows us about the percentage of technology gadgets used by people in two different years in Canada.
Corrected
Corrected version:
The given pie chart shows the percentage of technology gadgets used by people in two different years in Canada.
Explanation:
The original sentence uses the phrase "shows us about," which is not grammatically correct. The correct preposition to use in this case is "of."
Improved
Improved version:
The pie chart shows the percentage of technology gadgets used by Canadians in 2009 and 2019.
2
Original Text
As mobile phones become the most priority of the people in 2019 at 26% of usage which was only 15% in the year 2009.
Corrected
Corrected version:
As mobile phones became the most prioritized gadget for people in 2019, with a usage rate of 26%, up from 15% in 2009.
Explanation:
The original sentence uses the word "priority" as a noun, but in this context it should be used as an adjective. The correct phrase is "most prioritized."
Improved
Improved version:
Mobile phones were the most popular gadget for Canadians in 2019, with a usage rate of 26%, a 11% increase from 2009.
3
Original Text
Desktop computer faces a less drop of 6% only from 18% to 12%.
Corrected
Corrected version:
Desktop computer usage decreased by 6%, from 18% to 12%.
Explanation:
The original sentence uses the phrase "faces a less drop," which is not grammatically correct. The correct phrase is "decreased by."
Improved
Improved version:
Desktop computer usage declined by 6 percentage points, from 18% to 12%.
4
Original Text
Whereas a big screen mobile phone called tablet was then liked by many people into 2019 and get a rise of 14% from 5% in 2009 to 19% in 2019.
Corrected
Corrected version:
Whereas a tablet, a type of big-screen mobile phone, was then likedby many people in 2019, with a usage rate of 19%, up from 5% in 2009.
Explanation:
The original sentence uses the phrase "a big screen mobile phone called tablet," which is awkward and redundant. The sentence can be improved by simply saying "a tablet."
Improved
Improved version:
Tablets, a type of large-screen mobile phone, became increasingly popular in Canada between 2009 and 2019, with their usage rate increasing by 14 percentage points, from 5% to 19%.
Source: Mr Aniket Mehla 24-06-23 MT 1
Original Text!
The given pie chart shows us about the percentage of technology gadgets used by people in two different years in Canada. The conventional TV is the gadget used most in the year 2009 and it comes to the least after the 10 years of period in 2019. As mobile phones become the most priority of the people in 2019 at 26% of usage which was only 15% in the year 2009. Desktop computer faces a less drop of 6% only from 18% to 12%. Whereas, flat-screen TV rises very high from 8% to 27%. Laptop usage drops to 12% in 2019 which is 20% in 2009. Whereas a big screen mobile phone called tablet was then liked by many people into 2019 and get a rise of 14% from 5% in 2009 to 19% in 2019. It can be that the usage of mobile phones, tablet and flat-screen TV rises and of laptop, desktop computer and conventional TV decreases.
Corrected!
The given pie chart shows us the percentage of technology gadgets used by people in two different years in Canada. The conventional TV was the gadget used most in 2009, and it came in last after 10 years in 2019. As of 2019, mobile phones are the most important device for people, accounting for 26% of all usage, up from 15% in 2009. Desktop computers face a drop of only 6%, from 18% to 12%. whereas flat-screen TVs rise very high, from 8% to 27%. Laptop usage drops to 12% in 2019, down from 20% in 2009. Whereas a big-screen mobile phone called a tablet was then liked by many people into 2019 and saw a rise of 14% from 5% in 2009 to 19% in 2019. It can be that the usage of mobile phones, tablets, and flat-screen TVs rises while that of laptops, desktop computers, and conventional TVs decreases.
IMPROVED VERSION
The given pie chart illustrates the percentage of technology gadgets used by individuals in Canada during two different years. In 2009, the conventional TV was the most prevalent gadget, but its usage declined significantly over a 10-year period, eventually becoming the least used device in 2019. Mobile phones emerged as the primary choice for people in 2019, with a usage rate of 26%, a notable increase from the mere 15% recorded in 2009. Meanwhile, desktop computers experienced a relatively modest decrease of 6%, dropping from 18% to 12%. Conversely, flat-screen TVs witnessed a substantial surge in popularity, soaring from 8% to 27%. The usage of laptops dipped to 12% in 2019, representing a decline from the 20% recorded in 2009. Conversely, tablets, which are larger-screen mobile phones, gained traction among a considerable number of individuals, experiencing a remarkable rise from 5% in 2009 to 19% in 2019, a 14% increase. In conclusion, it is evident that the usage of mobile phones, tablets, and flat-screen TVs exhibited an upward trend, while the usage of laptops, desktop computers, and conventional TVs witnessed a decline.