18

Task-2

Let's Learn from Others' Mistakes

Common Errors 

1

Source: Ms Kanak 26-07-23  MT 09

Original Text

The modern world is growing at a faster rate in every circle of life, but the reason that causes hindrance in its path is various health ailments, and the major contributor to any particular disease is, obesity.

Corrected

Corrected version:

The modern world is growing at a faster rate in every sphere of life, but the major hindrance is various health ailments, with obesity being the major contributor to many diseases.


Explanation: 

Replaced "circle of life" with "sphere of life" for clarity. Removed the repetition of "causes" and rephrased the sentence for better flow.

Improved

Improved version:

The rapid growth of the modern world in all aspects of life is hindered by various health ailments, with obesity being a significant factor in the development of numerous diseases.

2

Original Text

At present more people are overweight than ever before. 

Corrected

Corrected version:

Currently, there are more overweight people than ever before.


Explanation: 

Added the word "currently" for better sentence structure and clarity.

Improved

Improved version:

Presently, the number of overweight individuals has reached unprecedented levels.

3

Original Text

There are numerous reasons that causes obesity and can have adverse affects on body, leading to serious health issues. 

Corrected

Corrected version:

There are numerous reasons that cause obesity and can have adverse effects on the body, leading to serious health issues.


Explanation: 

Changed "causes" to "cause" to match the subject-verb agreement. Replaced "affects" with "effects" for correct usage. Added the article "the" before "body" for clarity.

Improved

Improved version:

There are multiple factors that contribute to obesity and can have detrimental effects on the body, resulting in severe health complications.

4

Original Text

Obesity is the major concerning issue for a substantial number of people. 

Corrected

Corrected version:

Obesity is a major concern for a substantial number of people. 

Explanation: 

Replaced "concerning" with "concern" for better sentence structure and clarity.

Improved

Improved version:

Obesity is a significant concern for a considerable portion of the population.

5

Original Text

One of the main causes behind this is advancements in technology. 

Corrected

Corrected version:

One of the main causes behind this is the advancement in technology.

Explanation: 

Added the article "the" before "advancement" for correct usage.

Improved

Improved version:

One of the primary factors responsible for this is the advancement of technology.

6

Original Text

With the development in technology, people are more relied on electronic gadgets for most of their work. 

Corrected

Corrected version:

With the development of technology, people rely more on electronic gadgets for most of their work.


Explanation: 


Replaced "in" with "of" for correct usage. Rearranged the sentence for better flow.

Improved

Improved version:

With the progress of technology, individuals increasingly depend on electronic devices for their daily tasks.

7

Original Text

A great many people are engaged in using social media, playing games online and even doing their work on gadgets like mobile phones and laptops. 

Corrected

Corrected version:

Many people are engaged in using social media, playing games online, and even doing their work on gadgets like mobile phones and laptops. 


Explanation: 


Removed the word "great" as it is unnecessary. Added commas to separate the different activities for better clarity.

Improved

Improved version:

A significant number of individuals are immersed in activities such as social media usage, online gaming, and even work tasks on devices such as mobile phones and laptops. 

8

Original Text

Due to lack of physical activity and much reliance on technology leads to weight gain, and making people obese. 

Corrected

Corrected version:

Due to a lack of physical activity and excessive reliance on technology, it leads to weight gain and makes people obese.

Explanation: 

Added the article "a" before "lack" for correct usage. Added the word "excessive" before "reliance" for better description. Removed the comma and replaced "and" with "it" for better sentence structure.

Improved

Improved version:

The combination of insufficient physical activity and excessive dependence on technology results in weight gain and obesity.

9

Original Text

Unhealthy lifestyle is a second major contributor towards obesity. 

Corrected

Corrected version:

An unhealthy lifestyle is a second major contributor to obesity.

Explanation:

Added the article "an" before "unhealthy" for correct usage. 

Improved

Improved version:

An unhealthy lifestyle is another significant factor contributing to the prevalence of obesity.

10

Original Text

Nowadays, people tend to eat junk food, processed and packaged foods. 

Corrected

Corrected version:

Nowadays, people tend to eat junk food and processed and packaged foods.

Explanation:

Added the conjunction "and" to separate the two types of food for clarity.

Improved

Improved version:

In the present era, individuals have a tendency to consume unhealthy junk food and processed and packaged meals.

11

Original Text

As the life is becoming much faster, people do not have enough time to cook food and these processed and packaged foods are readily available, making it easier for them to eat easily. 

Corrected

Corrected version:

As life is becoming faster, people do not have enough time to cook food, and these processed and packaged foods are readily available, making it easier for them to eat.

Explanation:

Removed the article "the" before "life" for correct usage. Added a comma before "and" to separate the two clauses. Removed the repetition of "easily" for better sentence structure.

Improved

Improved version:

With the increasing pace of life, individuals face time constraints that limit their ability to cook meals, leading to a reliance on easily accessible processed and packaged foods.

12

Original Text

However, this regular eating of junk food can have serious effects on body. 

Corrected

Corrected version:

However, this regular eating of junk food can have serious effects on the body.

Explanation:

Added the article "the" before "body" for correct usage. 

Improved

Improved version:

Nevertheless, the regular consumption of junk food can have detrimental effects on one's physical well-being.

13

Original Text

Serious ailments like heart attack, high blood pressure, diabetes, etc. can be caused by obesity.

Corrected

Corrected version:

Serious ailments like heart attack, high blood pressure, diabetes, etc., can be caused by obesity.

Explanation:

Added a comma before "etc." for correct punctuation. 

Improved

Improved version:

Obesity can contribute to the development of severe conditions such as heart attacks, high blood pressure, diabetes, and more.

14

Original Text

Being overweight can affect social and physiological lifestyle of people, making it difficult for them to survive. 

Corrected

Corrected version:

Being overweight can affect the social and physiological lifestyle of people, making it difficult for them to survive.

Explanation:

Added the article "the" before "social" for correct usage. 

Improved

Improved version:

Excessive weight can significantly impact individuals' social and physiological well-being, posing challenges to their overall quality of life.

15

Original Text

In severe cases, obesity can also lead to cancer, which is an uncurable disease. 

Corrected

Corrected version:

In severe cases, obesity can also lead to cancer, which is an incurable disease.

Explanation: 

Replaced "uncurable" with "incurable" for correct spelling.

Improved

Improved version:

In extreme instances, obesity can even result in the development of incurable diseases like cancer.

Source: Ms Kanak 26-07-23  MT 09

Original Text!

  The modern world is growing at a faster rate in every circle of life, but the reason that causes hindrance in its path is various health ailments, and the major contributor to any particular disease is, obesity. At present more people are overweight than ever before. There are numerous reasons that causes obesity and can have adverse affects on body, leading to serious health issues.

Obesity is the major concerning issue for a substantial number of people. One of the main causes behind this is advancements in technology. With the development in technology, people are more relied on electronic gadgets for most of their work. A great many people are engaged in using social media, playing games online and even doing their work on gadgets like mobile phones and laptops. Due to lack of physical activity and much reliance on technology leads to weight gain, and making people obese.

Unhealthy lifestyle is a second major contributor towards obesity. Nowadays, people tend to eat junk food, processed and packaged foods. As the life is becoming much faster, people do not have enough time to cook food and these processed and packaged foods are readily available, making it easier for them to eat easily. However, this regular eating of junk food can have serious effects on body. 

Serious ailments like heart attack, high blood pressure, diabetes, etc. can be caused by obesity. Being overweight can affect social and physiological lifestyle of people, making it difficult for them to survive. In severe cases, obesity can also lead to cancer, which is an uncurable disease. Therefore, it is necessary to maintain our lifestyle, limiting the usage of technology to a certain level.

Corrected!

    The modern world is growing at a faster rate in every circle of life, but the reason that causes hindrance in its path is various health ailments, and the major contributor to any particular disease is obesity. At present, more people are overweight than ever before. There are numerous reasons that cause obesity and can have adverse effects on the body, leading to serious health issues.

Obesity is a major concerning issue for a substantial number of people. One of the main causes behind this is advancements in technology. With the development of technology, people rely more on electronic gadgets for most of their work. A great many people are engaged in using social media, playing games online, and even doing their work on gadgets like mobile phones and laptops. Due to a lack of physical activity and much reliance on technology, it leads to weight gain and makes people obese.

An unhealthy lifestyle is a second major contributor to obesity. Nowadays, people tend to eat junk food, processed, and packaged foods. As life is becoming much faster, people do not have enough time to cook food, and these processed and packaged foods are readily available, making it easier for them to eat quickly. However, regular consumption of junk food can have serious effects on the body.

Serious ailments like heart attacks, high blood pressure, diabetes, etc. can be caused by obesity. Being overweight can affect the social and physiological lifestyle of people, making it difficult for them to survive. In severe cases, obesity can also lead to cancer, which is an incurable disease. Therefore, it is necessary to maintain our lifestyle, limiting the usage of technology to a certain level.

IMPROVED VERSION

 The modern world is experiencing rapid growth in all aspects of life, but this progress is hindered by various health ailments, with obesity being a significant contributor to numerous diseases. Currently, there is a higher prevalence of overweight individuals than ever before.

There are multiple factors that contribute to obesity and can have detrimental effects on the body, leading to severe health complications. Obesity is a major concern for a substantial portion of the population. One of the primary factors responsible for this is the advancement of technology.

With the progress of technology, individuals increasingly depend on electronic devices for their daily tasks. A significant number of individuals are immersed in activities such as social media usage, online gaming, and even work tasks on devices such as mobile phones and laptops. The combination of insufficient physical activity and excessive dependence on technology results in weight gain and obesity. An unhealthy lifestyle is another significant factor contributing to the prevalence of obesity. In the present era, individuals have a tendency to consume unhealthy junk food and processed and packaged meals.

With the increasing pace of life, individuals face time constraints that limit their ability to cook meals, leading to a reliance on easily accessible processed and packaged foods. Nevertheless, the regular consumption of junk food can have detrimental effects on one's physical well-being.

Obesity can contribute to the development of severe conditions such as heart attacks, high blood pressure, diabetes, and more. Excessive weight can significantly impact individuals' social and physiological well-being, posing challenges to their overall quality of life. In extreme instances, obesity can even result in the development of incurable diseases like cancer.

Key Phrases: